You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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