Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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