covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
