VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I am one with the molecules
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
