It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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