he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
