So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
