i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
