It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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