remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Are we still banned from the library?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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