Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I see more hoeing in ur future
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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