Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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