i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
