so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
