Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
