Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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