I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
