Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize