I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
