First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
