I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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