So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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