I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
