what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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