My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Ladies don't puke and tell
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