just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize