i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
