I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
