i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize