Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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