Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
