and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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