either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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