actually, I'm a sock model
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
