You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize