I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
