Dude my mom stole all your condoms
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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