I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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