i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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