just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
