I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
