So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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