ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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