you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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