I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
