Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
