Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
