ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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