Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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