a search helicopter?!
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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