Already got asked if we're dating
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
