Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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