Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
